The Great Debate: How To Get The Man You Want

Question: Should you “strategize” to find the man that you want? Should you treat finding a husband like finding a job?

Do you think it is a successful practice to put meeting Mr. Right and getting married on a timetable and thus develop a Plan of Action (POA) or strategy for accomplishing this goal?

Should you go out with the specific purpose of meeting men?


This is what I see on a lot of on the IR blogs. Obviously it works for some- it hasn’t necessarily worked for me. But I’m not going to down this practice. Many women, (some call them gold diggers- I don’t particularly care for that term), have set out with the specific purpose of meeting and marrying wealthy men (i.e. Ginie Polo Sayles, Heather Mills). From my personal experience, I’ve met more men when I wasn’t thinking about it- when I wasn’t trying to meet them.

I agree that finding a suitable mate often requires the same skills needed to find a job. Sometimes first dates can be a lot like job interviews- LOL!

I’ve heard arguments for both sides. Some women identified who they wanted or, set out with the goal to meet and marry a certain person and did just that. They are perfectly happy with their decision. I’ve known others who’ve let things happen more organically and didn’t try to force things- they’re just as happy.

I agree that if you want to get into a relationship it is important to identify what it is that you want and find a way to “be around” that type of person. It also comes down to the vibes and energy you’re sending out to other people.

If marriage is your ultimate goal it is also necessary to be around marriage minded people; and if your guy makes it clear to you that he‘s not interested in marriage, than cut your losses and move on.

My concern is that by relegating a relationship to a timetable you may ultimately end up missing out (i.e. pushing a good guy away, settling for “Mr. He’s Right Here” because you have to meet your deadline).

Ultimately it all depends on the person what scenario will work best for them. In the meantime, since part of this blogs purpose is to discuss and develop strategies that will allow BW to achieve the relationships they want, I’d love to hear your thoughts and opinions regarding these questions. Discuss amongst yourselves!